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Fears and inferiorities

Ok most people that know me on social media somewhat knows my reasons for dismissing feminism as a woman supporting movement. Quite the opposite it sows a lot of hate and injustice among women in modern days. But it doesn’t need to be so 

Nevertheless it is so simply because there are issues that haven’t been correctly addressed in terms of justice and how history have formed todays society. But I am not gonna go deep in history lessons now as many of us actually know the facts and the truth about it all already. It’s  not really that we don’t know but that we know and won’t speak about what we know that is the problem. 

However it takes a lot of courage and lingual skills and techniques to adress this sensitive issues. No one wants to speak about such tough subjects as the hate between women.  And certainly no-one want to admit the truth or even be conflicted with uncomfortable facts when pretending  to not know is an option. Nor men or women want to face their guilt voluntarily really.  

However, I have noticed that men tend to be a little more direct even when they refuse to see the full perspectives or agree on the issue I am about to adress now. Which is the hate between women and in particularly between different races. Of course this differences between women makes it easier to discus with men since men are more interested in the positive aspects that benefit them. Anyhow it also make it easier to address the problem thereby and progress forth to some solution or to a higher consciousness and perspectives. That is what progress is. To increase your perspective and thereby your progress to better position. And it is after all progress that modern feminist women want inorder to achieve equality right? Then how can that be done by totally denying truth?  

As a christian woman I don’t honestly believe women and men are the same and so how can they be equal? They were created to complete each others weaknesses and strengths not become competitors. To me it is the most strange thing to resemble a man as woman. In fact I don’t think I compete with anyone at all. I have too many of my own goals and struggles to do so. And so I guess I tend to miss that not all are as free minded as some of us are and easily feel the threat when the truth happen to be outspoken by the likes of me.

As a christian woman it is not my job to degrade feminism even when I at times joke about it because I don’t agree with it. Simply because it won’t solve women’s issues. Because change requires discomfort by addressing truths and above all sacrifices. And in todays world women or feminists are not aiming to sacrifice or address the full truth with all its discomforts. So how can feminism reap what it haven’t been sowing? But I know of a savior that have sacrificed more than enough to save men and women’s pain and injustices. Unfortunately modern women are not interested in this savior at all and will ridicule it rather than understand it. They are fully capable and want to save themselves by their own means, muscles and power. 

Yet something just doesn’t add upp. I know women after all are spiritual beings, spiritual leaders and nurturers of our world but too busy competing with men on irrelevant things. A challenge they never will win. My message or point in all of this is therefore  not to disempower but to share my perspective in how women can win it by using the right means. Women’s natural strengths and gifts are more spiritual or psychological than physical. The injustice that have been created for them by the aid in their own bitterness and resentments of the hurt they got from years of abuse from ignorant men.  

So I am writing this post to help you sisters address the problem because the only way to come out of hell is through it. And since I have been through hell my self I know the owner of that place and how cruel that spirit is and how possessive it can be. I know the tools I ve used to come out of there a little bured but unhurt and untouched from the evil. Yes, I tell you I walked literary through ”the valley of death” alone and with only my faith and my tools. It was and I know it will be a challenge for you too but, that’s also all it is. That you can and will win it. The revolution happens from the inside when you face the naked truth for yourselves sisters. So I ve listed 5 supporting points to help and be guided by here below

  1. Be your self. Speak honestly and address your challenges to your self, your partner or family and friends
  2. Speak truth and face your own misdeeds towards other women. Don’t hide them and be cautious not to speak only out of hurts. But be proud of your self for knowing your strength, value and genuine relations to other genuine women.
  3. Dear ask for forgiveness (privately) and make necessary changes you need for yourself and force will work with you not against you. Because what you are against is against you and what you support supports you. Remember that that’s a rule of the universe. Start genuinely supporting someone who needs support not inorder to get praised for it but because you want to support that person from your heart. 
  4. Stop expecting men or the patriarchy or hold anyone on the opposite sex responsible to the issues you face. They know already but they also know that you don’t care enough about it your self obviously. Otherwise you would ve made a different decision. The problems you experience are there for you to develop coping skills with them or eliminate them not to dwell in them
  5. Do not compare your life with anyone  nor men or other women unless it is to help others to reach to a better level or better yet to at least your own level and know that by doing so you will automatically move up many levels of respects for your self even when no one notices of it. Trust me on this. No ones praises or confidence in you shines better than your own self confidence at the end of the day. Integrity is about self value 

Trust the process and your intuition. What is right is not always comfortable but it feels right and won’t hurt you only challenge you. 

Everything in life fixes itself when one fix oneself first. So sisters fix yourselves and you will fix the world including men by adding your own fixed strong perspectives in it. Stop trying to fix men so they can fix the world for you. They are not capable for this at all. You will only be adding more fire to the burn in hell. Heal and mend your self instead and you will heal and mend plenty more in this world 

If you need one to one coaching to cope with fear or inferiority issues that a lot of women deal with due to being undervalued or mistreated by men or other women contact me and inform me how I can contact you for a free trial session. 

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Time for new Beginnings


Easter is here again so before wishing you a happy one I have decided to share some ( maybe provoking) thoughts in the hope to awaken and bring some healing change. To me Easters main message is “rebirth” through forgiveness and letting go in order to restart fresh beginnings again. I hope this is useful to anyone but I am specifically considering the black community. Simply because I think that the time to let go of past hurts and bitterness have long been overdue. Still I keep coming across bitter and pathetic reasons to dwell, blame and hate in this community like no other. I am NOT saying that we black people have/are not being treated unfairly. We are.

Not only by the “white populations” capitalistic system but also by our own and most other people too unfortunately. Just look at the classic corruption scheming model being successfully used over and over by the west in Africa. It wasn’t always like this you know? There were ones glory days for this now brutally abused continent. But the corrupted leaders of today in this very rich continent are the very loyal allies of the oppressors. Another milder form of conning black people within the west is seen in the whole Obama leadership. Personally I like the Obamas very much but by now, I with many more understand the symbolism behind this fruitless election. Having a first black president may have been very special and thrilling in the land where blacks were once slaves? I understand that. See, I on the other hand come from a country and a continent were there not only always ruled black presidents from the beginning of time but also black emperors and king of kings as well as renowned queens.

As a black person residing in the west I am now expected to be thrilled and gratefully receive a “role model” for the first time by the good will of “white” benevolence? Hello! Where have some black people hidden their brains and voices nowadays? Under a stone in the shadows? I urge you to dig it out and place it back to your heads again please. We may be a minority in the west but we are not dumb. For heavens sake! Who is playing who here? No! There are no “first times” for black people. Sorry to ruin your self pity and illusionary low expectations. Stop commercialising/selling your ideas and selves as the first black person to achieve this or that. There have been many blacks before you that most probably achieved many things with more limitations and ignored recognitions. But most importantly there will be more a lot more to come. So stop falling for this limiting scheme now immediately. It is more abusing and hindering than promoting. It comes from a limited mind

I am not saying not to be proud and lift achievements of black success today. Please do. We need plenty of that. Regardless of how uncomfortable others may react. But rethink and refrain from the label “the first or only black” as an old marketing cliche. You are helping in belittling our race as inferior and incapable when you focus on our colour to this extent (or at least add “the first black after slavery” to achieve this or that). In fact this schemingly trendy idea is nothing but a corrupted convenient way for whites to sell you their dogmas. Have you even thought about that or do you believe that we all are as corrupted?

Yes, the Obama effect has become very commercial even in Europe now ready to be milked out  symbolically and drag us all blacks further behind again. Because blacks cannot achieve anything by themselves right? They need the white mans assistance, validation and humane benevolence to come to power positions so they have to appeal to the white majority only by sympathy votes hm? Not by fighting their battles and attaining respect God forbid. Is that what you want to leave as a legacy to your children? So very sad! To make matters worst I keep coming across debates and articles to further widen the gaps between blacks today by some lame arguments like the heading of this following article here

This kind of article always seem to confirm to me that there are quite a few out there equating blackens with total ugliness and sadness. No wonder why I feel like a “mood” terrorist with my very positive prideful blackness that ruins this very trendy pity party in the community? Then again there are obvious incentives and rewards for this attitudes in our society today so I shouldn’t be surprised I guess. Sympathy for blacks …and “white guilt” go hand in hand in western culture like milk and honey.

This destructive and toxic relationship permeates through out not only private personal relationships but also pervades the political and global scene as observable in our world today. Despite the fact that I am very positive that colorism is addressed here, I am concerned about the easy and lazy conclusions that result in the blaming game. From what I know about healing, nowhere have I read that recovering health and happiness comes by blaming others.This very faulty conclusion is also how blacks remained in this defeating position for so long when in reality we are the ones with the most potentials. Please people let go of the hurt and forgive! I am not saying forget. I am saying learn. It was only a lesson nothing else. Let it go now and start anew with these valuable lessons in hand.

Shifting guilt among us doesn’t make the oppression go away. It only shifts and take turns to RE-PRESS us instead of uplift us. But yes for the sake of the argument in the article I will agree that there may be so called “privileges” such as being easier accepted into the white norm the lighter the persons skin tone happen to be. However it is only relevant if this person in question idealises whiteness. A person like this will unquestionably suffer spiritually regardless of skin colour simply  because one is denying their true self while appeasing to those outside factors that are dictating their ideals. How can  they then complain to be denied when they them self do that to their self first?

There are a lot of people with fairer or darker complexion like me for example that don’t have any desire whatsoever to look like anything else but our own selves. Nothing against the others but we are all what we are. For this purpose alone you will also struggle against the mainstream that labels you as a sort of freak. Believe it or not the struggle is the same for all at the end of the day. It always equals out. Why not try compassion it will console your soul in much better ways and start with your self, your children or your own folks first ok? I cannot stress this enough

Furthermore why would it really be considered a privilege to be “liked” by whites just to serve as an exploitation material. And if you live in their world you will have a lot more higher risk of being subjugated weather you are aware of it or not. The most sad thing about this whole issue though is that once again this “system” is still orchestrating division among us like they have done for so long using their ideals and some very handy self hate in our own community. Are you ok with that or are you ready to let go now? We need to be unite instead of throwing up silly excuses to remain in the same place just so we can be “lucky” to title our selves “the first/only black person to ever be pathetic enough to need the validation for example…hm?  I mean common!      

Blackness does not sit in the shade. It is in how aware we are of our identity and STRUGGLES. That is blackness. Because to be black today is to be strong in a world that want to see you weak. Let go of that projection! It is not yours. Forgive them. You are much stronger now. Be the role model your  children needs you to be. Because children become what they see you do and be, not just what you or others teach them to become. Be a person they respect and admire not someone they feel sorry for all the time. You can do so much more and are able to exemplify that possibility for your beloveds your self 

I really hope I have managed to inspire some or any of you by sharing my thoughts and I hope you will do the same for others in your community before blaming them. In the meantime, I wish you all a happy Easter festivities with some more joyous pictures here 🙂 

This cute design will be available to order in all children’s sizes and outlined colours. It is made mostly from ecological materials and by environmentally friendly colouring techniques thereby suitable for most sensitive skin types…..and tones 🙂 For more detailed information or questions you are welcome to mail me.